The vast, contrasting experiences of change are sometimes overwhelming.
“I feel as if it isn’t real.”
“My mood changes over the slightest things.”
“I feel so relieved.”
“I never knew it would hurt so bad!”
“Why do I feel out of control.”
“I’m so lonely.”
“I don’t want others to see me when I feel so sad.”
“I miss being touched.”
“I’m eating all the time.”
“I don’t feel hungry.”
Grief is often compared to the ocean waves.
You may feel okay one moment, then like you’re going under the next. It’s exhausting at times. It can feel like you need a life vest, but you don’t have one.
This past year was riddled with loss for every human on the planet. It’s important to honor the ups and downs of the grieving process, whether what you lost was a dear loved one, or a wedding or school year you expected to go differently. No two experiences are the same; nor can we compare our circumstances to that of another person. We simply have to honor our own feelings, and nurture ourselves when we navigate changes.
Conflicting and complex feelings often cause people to want to isolate, but they are challenging to navigate alone.
It is important to reach out and talk with people and to cry when you need to. Unfortunately, our culture doesn’t offer tools to help understand and navigate the natural experience of acute grief or to unblock complicated grief. Friends and family members often say or do unhelpful things in well-intended efforts to support people who are grieving.
There are useful support groups, books, podcasts & websites about grief, and learning more can help. Sometimes your support system of friends and family are there for you or in it with you. There are counselors who can listen and offer tools, when needed. Just remember, these grief responses are all natural and normal.
People grieve because we are human, capable of love and care.